Epic silly Evolutionary Bio-shit

OK, this is too funny to be true, but it is there in today’s TIMES LIFE and it is not there as a spoof, but as a serious answer to this world’s most important question:

‘Have you ever wondered why women spend hours trying to find the right outfit while men know what is that they exactly want, purchase it quickly and exit the store? ‘

Taaadaaa… the answer is:

‘ This difference in shopping styles dates back to pre-historic times when women spent their days gathering good quality food and men were hunters with a clear plan about how to catch their prey. Once it was killed, they’d straight return home. But women, when gathering, would be very careful about the right texture and smell of food to ensure safety and quality. This mirrors in women’s shopping pattern today.’

I swear on my handbook of ‘ FUCK EVOLUTIONARY BIOLOGY IN ITS PREHISTORIC ASS’ that I am not making this up, you can read it in today’s Times of India.

I guess advertisers, marketeers and the multi-billion dollar industry targeting women to buy multiple unnecessary things by comodifying women’s bodies and minds can fold up and retire. Starting with Times of India. Because hey- it is fucking prehistoric times, ok? Women can’t help but shop because it is fucking biology, ok? OK? OK?

Phew. Let me go back to my pre-historic pleasure of picking my nose while brutally killing my noisy neighbours on this lazy Sunday.

5 thoughts on “Epic silly Evolutionary Bio-shit

  1. such assumptions no… I love shopping but after spending one hour in the mall I get so irritated that I leave with whatever I can lay my hands on.. and I know ample fussy male shoppers.. such bogus..

    • Absolute bogusness… the most annoying part is that these so called studies totally ignore the role of society and culture in shaping people’s behaviour, and harp upon a limited idea of ‘wired behaviour’ to justify pretty much anything.

  2. Yeah I read that. Annoying no? First, I don’t buy the assumption that all women love shopping which is why they spend hours in malls. I hate shopping, unless of course it’s for food.

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